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 How To Break Up With Someone Remember that we're talking about dating, not relationships. So this is ending it with someone you have not been involved with long or seriously. Do not follow these rules for someone you are or have been in love with or you will go to Hell for all eternity. Also, remember there should be no brutal honesty. So, the words "It turns out I'm really not all that attracted to you" or "I thought your laugh was endearing but actually it sounds like a donkey" or "I'd rather sit home and watch those twins on 'Full House' than listen to that stupid story about your fraternity again" should never cross your lips. The way to do this is to pick an excuse that does have some truth to it. I'm not over my ex-girlfriend yet. Work is way too intense right now. I always get depressed in February. I just don't believe that people born in the year of the rat should date people born in the year of the dragon. That kind of thing. (Please note: My work is way too intense right now and I'm not over my ex-boyfriend. So when I say that, it's not just an excuse, ok?) So, with your excuse in hand you go to the other person and present it as if it's a problem that you've recently become aware of. And you start a conversation in which you pretend that it gradually dawns on you that well, I guess what I really need is some time alone. That way it looks like you didn't really sit down to break up with the other person. It doesn't just hit them out of the blue. Once this sentiment is out there--firmly stated--you don't have to revisit it. It has become clear that this is a Break Up conversation and repeating the point is only hurtful. Now you start saying things like "It's really too bad, because I've been having a good time with you" and "If it were at a different point in my life it probably could have worked out" and "I guess that's why I've been so cranky lately, you've been great to put up with me. I'll miss you." Do you understand what's going on here? You are continually reiterating that Yes, It's Over while couching it in really complimentary language. Now we all know that in reality you just
like someone or you don't. But people who are being rejected will suspend disbelief
to save their egos and it's only civilized to help them out. I repeat: do not
use this technique on someone with whom you're seriously involved. They deserve
a little more honesty and a little more time to get used to the idea. My first
love broke up with me this way. My only consolation is that Hell is supposed to
be a very desolate place. - Back Duplication or reproduction of any use of these articles without permission is subjected to punishable by law. Please contact our webmaster for any questions. |
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