I'm suddenly dating
again after some 3 years of being comfortably ensconced in a nice, secure relationship.
The dating part is kind of fun--but I'm in awe of how bad people are at it. Some
of these boys go way too far, never taking no for an answer even though your secretary
has obviously screened their calls all week. Some boys are way too shy and can't
figure out that, yes, sticking your tongue in their ear means you like them. Some
boys hold such promise and then blow it by some innopportune act like asking if
they can kiss you. (I thought that once Diane Chambers announced in the last episode
of the first season of Cheers that a guy should NEVER ask first that this faux
pas would forever be put to rest. But no.)
The point of these rules are
threefold: how to date successfully, how to do embarrassing things without putting
yourself out on the line TOO much, and how to read signals from the other person.
This last one is kind of key-- people spend way too much time thinking that their
love interests are being cryptic when just the littlest bit of effort can make
it all crystal clear. These are not rules for relationships. Relationships are
a whole different ball of wax. In general relationships are much better considered
case by case. The dating rules are for involvements with people you don't know
that well, people you'd like to get to know better, or people you'd like to let
down gently and not have to get to know better.
Also, these are not rules
for when you've met someone and it's all just rolling along perfectly. You're
clearly doing it right; ignore my dumb rules. These rules are for in between the
times when it's rolling along perfectly.
-------------------------------------
Karen
C. Fox is a freelance writer in Washington, DC and the author of
"The Big Bang Theory: What It Is, Where It Came From, and Why It Matters."
|  | The
General Philosophy
Read |
 | Pick
Up Lines (Good Ones, Actually)
Read
|
 |
I Know It's A Weird Concept, But Boys Actually Do Have Feelings
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 | How
To Be Broken Up With
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 | Why
Girls Want Flowers
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 | Blowing
People Off
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 | How
To Break Up With Someone
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 | Compliments
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 | Girls
Are Crazy, Boys Are Dumb: The General Philosophy, Part Deux
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 | What
to Do When You Randomly Kissed Some Girl Last Night
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 | How
To Kiss Someone
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 | How
To Tell If They Like You
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 | Who
Pays On A First Date
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 | Phone
Calls
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 | Exchanging
Phone Numbers
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 | How
to Ask Someone Out
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 | But,
Girls, This Doesn't Give You The Right To Be Psycho
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 | What
To Do When You Wake Up Next To Someone
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 | What
To Do When He Just Wants You For Your Body
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 | What
To Do When You Randomly Kissed Some Boy Last Night
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 | Girls
ARE High Maintenance. Deal With It
Read
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 | How
To Jump Start Your Love Life
Read
|
